Dream Team
by Baron Nomaw
Summary: Harry and Draco are Aurors.  Who probably should never be partnered together.


"I refuse to believe this." Malfoy's voice was low and cold. "This cannot be happening. We are going to die – to _die_," he snarled, "In a third-rate magical booby trap set by a crazy old man to protect something nobody wants anyway. This _cannot_ be how we die."

Harry was too busy feeling at the stone walls, looking for a spot where the texture was off. "Relax, Malfoy. It's only been a couple of hours. We'll think of something."

"Without wands?"

"Some people live their whole lives without wands," Harry reminded patiently. "Just help me. _All _box traps have seams. And _all _box traps weaken eventually if they're not powered by something – which this one isn't. At the worst we'll just wait for the whole charm to expire. It's got to run out of power soon. We'll be out of here by tonight. Promise."

* * *

><p>Malfoy sat in a corner, hugging his knees. "My testamentary charms are nearly four years out of date," he mused. "One of my old girlfriends is going to get that pendant I wear, the dragon with the ruby eyes. Stupid slag. What was I thinking? Well, that's what I get for dying wandless like a rat in a trap next to Harry bloody P-"<p>

"I told you we are not going to die!" Harry snarled. Two days without food was a lot, even for Aurors trained to battle on through hardships of all kinds. Two days was a lot. Especially two days with Draco Malfoy.

"Yes, we are." Malfoy banged his head softly against the wall. "I cannot _believe _this. I partner the one person in the world who should _never _get killed in the field, ever, and what happens? We get killed. Why in Merlin's name didn't you bring an emergency kit?"

"Because this is routine and we weren't supposedto _have_ an emergency!" He was exhausted, too exhausted to try and control his temper. "Anyway, why didn't _you _bring one? I'll tell you why. Because you know as well as I do that when we _do _have emergencies, the kit never helps!"

Malfoy's lip curled. "Food and a spare wand and a cell phone would have been pretty bloody helpful now, Potter. We are caught in what is apparently the world's first self-sustaining box trap and there is not a thing we can do about it. We are _fucked_, Potter. We are dead."

"How is that helpful? Complaining is not helpful. Get off your arse and help me go over the walls again. _That _would be helpful."

Harry held out his hand to pull Malfoy up, but Malfoy ignored it. "I'm not just complaining - I'm also thinking. Which may be a foreign concept to you, Potter, but I promise, it _is _helpful."

"Look… all right, what if it's not a box trap?" Harry suggested after a moment. "Because you're right, they _can't_ be self-sustaining. Maybe you made a mistake with the detection spell. We could be in an oubliette, a custom one charmed to _look _like a box trap, and then-"

"I didn't make a mistake with the detection spell, you ignoramus. What do you think I am?"

Harry swallowed down some of his more colorful answers. "A terrible person to be trapped in a small room with."

* * *

><p>"Potter! Hey – wake up, Potter!"<p>

"Stoppit. Stop shaking me. Leave me alone."

"What's the matter with you? You don't look good."

"I just need a moment."

"No. You can't go to sleep – something's wrong, look at you, you're too weak. You're never going to wake up."

"Ridiculous. I'll be fine, let me sleep. Shh."

"Potter! Get up! Don't you dare leave me in here with a dead body! Potter!"

"Shhhhhh."

* * *

><p>"Hey. Hey. Harry." Malfoy's voice was no longer panicky. Now it was quiet and intense, and since it didn't grate so hard on Harry's ears he was able to respond to it.<p>

"What?"

"Get up. Get up, I have to ask you something."

Harry let himself be manhandled into a sitting position. "How long have we been down here?"

"A couple of days."

"Without water you can only _live_ for a couple of days, you know."

"I know. Which is why I want to ask you something." Malfoy moved away from him and faced a wall. "A favor. A strange favor."

Harry wasn't sure exactly what kind of favor he could do trapped in a small room with no wand, but anyway he nodded at Malfoy's back. They might actually die here. Let him ask. "Go on."

"Well I've sometimes thought… I mean, I don't know, but I've wondered a few times if… I…"

"Spit it out, Malfoy."

Malfoy took a deep breath and then said all in a rush: "It's occurred to me once or twice that I might be a homosexual but I've never done anything about it and I think it would be a shame to die without trying so can I kiss you."

Harry gaped. "Oh," he said at last. "That… is a strange favor." Malfoy was still facing away. Shaking now. Harry wasn't sure if it was starvation or nervousness making him tremble like that but either way it was sad to watch. Would it really be that hard to just suck it up and give him what he wanted? They were probably going to die anyway. "Well…" he hesitated. "Er… All right, I guess…"

"I _knew _it!" Malfoy crowed, and whirled to face him. Still shaking with laughter. "I knew it, I knew it, I _knew _it! I'm going to tell everyone! Harry Potter flies for the other team. Harry Potter loves the broomstick! Harry Potter's wand is-"

"Malfoy!" Harry scrambled up to hit him and they ended up wrestling on the floor. Eventually he got the upper hand and held Malfoy still until his crazed laughter had stopped. "Do you really want to die being an ass? An immature, _stupid_-"

"Shove off, Potter." Malfoy grinned up at him. "We're not going to die. I found out why it's not expiring: the trap's drawing energy from _you_. When you passed out I found a seam. All we have to do is knock you all the way unconscious, and I should be able to get us free."

Harry got off him. "It's a good thing we work in pairs then – this really would be fatal for one person."

"Yeah."

"But I think I'd still rather be down here alone. I'm never partnering with you again, Malfoy."

"You said that last time."

* * *

><p>The End.<p>

I kind of think they'd be an adorable set of work partners who can't get along.


End file.
